A renaissance can occur whenever you choose

"Life imitates art" right?

I don’t often think about my former life — a life of weekly vocal training, choir performances, auditions, (painfully awful) attempts at ballet, monologues recited, Shakespeare studied, and plays attended. For most of my life, the arts were really all I cared about. It’s funny to think about it now, I often forget that part of my life ever existed. When I turned 18 a lot of things changed rapidly for me. I moved to New York, got busy, and I somewhat accidentally left the arts behind in pursuit of a more stable income, a college degree, and a lifestyle that felt responsible.

And really, I have no regrets.

I am much happier in my present life knowing that my career affords me all the self-sufficiency and leisure I presently desire. I never wanted to be the struggling artist. But part of me wonders why I don’t continue to enjoy these old habits in my free time. Just for my own enjoyment and not for any hopes of notoriety or monetary gain.

Maybe I’ve lost sight of some of the true joys of life in my “gen-z modern era” existence. I think a lot of people have. As a society, we are being overstimulated all the time, to the point of desensitization and a detachment from our own realities. Wanting fame at any cost. Living in a simulation where we are judged by numbers and virality. I would love to slow things down a bit. Live and feel each individual present moment a little more, rather than instinctually curing a hint of boredom with a screen. I want to have an appreciation for things that take time and spark real emotion and discovery — rather than a dopamine hit from the act of scrolling.

Maybe what I’m searching for is some real meaning. Maybe I want something to happen to me. Open the door to something different. Something challenging. Maybe I’m looking for inspiration. I want to break the frame. Splatter the pain t. Also, I just care less about things now — things aren’t so fragile.

And I’m reaching the point of my adulthood where I’m no longer in survival mode and can focus more of my attention and money on enjoying life. And creating art for enjoyment is so free from burdens and expectations. I don’t want to perform or even progress very much, I simply want to enjoy.

Upon having these thoughts I’ve decided — just this morning — that it’s time for my own personal renaissance. A resurgence of appreciation for the classics. A return to old ways. Just as the artists did in the 1500s. A desire for more creative pursuits and deeper cultural appreciation and understanding. Maybe this will fill me up in some way.

noun: Renaissance

• a revival of or renewed interest in something

• a movement or period of vigorous artistic and intellectual activity

• rebirth, revival

I’ve gathered a few definitions of the word “renaissance” to spark ideas. And while taking inspiration from the Renaissance period itself and also considering the definition of the word, I have a few thoughts on how to embrace this shift.

Some action items:

• Read more classic novels

• Finally open the canvases and paints I bought a year ago, maybe do some drawing too

• Play classical music in the background at home and while working to create an atmosphere of tranquility and thoughtfulness (in place of mindless podcasts that you are half listening to or other media that is more distracting than beneficial)

• Lay on the floor sometimes

• Enhance my personal style with an approach to fashion as self-expression rather than utility

• Sit curbside at coffee shops drinking espresso and watching people walk by

• Take vocal lessons again

• Find a way to jump into a body of water every once in a while

• Study a new language

• Try new restaurants at random

• Participate in activities for leisure with no end goal, just for pure enjoyment

• Watch good quality movies

• Take a spontaneous trip

• Learn more about history and culture

• Attend operas, ballets, plays, and classical musical performances

• Host small gatherings that bring new people together

• Visit museums

• Take long and slow strolls with no destination

Isn’t it funny how you just stop doing things and you almost forget they exist? I want to do things that make me remember I’m a real person. So real that I’ll become one of those book characters on a meaningful journey to some satisfying conclusion. But all stories have their conflicts. That’s the whole point really. And maybe doing the worst possible thing — being completely irrational — leads to the greatest story.